Resolving Conflict

Written By Colēgia

Conflict is something that has a habit of making us feel unprepared at times. This is natural as there will be instances where we don't have the skill set to properly manage these situations. Building up these skills is important which is why today we want to delve into some ways to resolve conflict within your personal life.

Listen

By far one of the best ways to help work on a conflict is to listen. This is important because it puts the focus on the other person in the room and lets them express themselves openly and honestly. Whether we agree with them at this point in time isn't the focus, but rather allowing them to be authentic is. The reason why this is good is that it can be easy to escalate a conflict by trying to get a word in. More often letting someone say their part can naturally diffuse the tension while also helping them cope with their emotions. We can take this a step further and opt for active listening which involves us paraphrasing and making sure we understand what the other side is trying to convey. In an argument for instance we can do this in a calm manner and by using the same side approach where we let them know that we are trying to empathize. Listening is one of the best first steps in a conflict because it demonstrates that we are able to put someone else first which can help.

“By far one of the best ways to help work on a conflict is to listen.”

Express Yourself

Depending on the type of conflict there will be the chance to express yourself. This is important because when we are experiencing this type of dilemma with someone else that we may be close to, it can give us the means to repair the relationship. A good example of this would be a conflict with a friend regarding their behavior. If you feel that their aggression for example is specifically being taken out on you, bringing it up in a delicate yet democratic manner can help establish a dialogue between you. It's equally important to let the other side know how you feel without going into it with the intent of changing someone's mind or behavior. True change needs to occur from within and forcing it on someone can rob them of their individual choice. Rather than doing that, going into something with the goal of expressing yourself without asking for change can allow for an honest conversation.

“It's equally important to let the other side know how you feel without going into it with the intent of changing someone's mind or behavior.”

Be Willing to Adjust Your Perspective

Conflict is difficult in that for many people our ego can often be a barrier toward improvement. This is good to recognize because in many instances we want to be right rather than focusing on maintaining a relationship or ensuring both sides needs are being met. In a conflict we need to accept that we aren't always right and while our feelings are valid we need to keep our thoughts malleable in the face of new information. It's impossible to truly experience and understand the entire story at times which is why we need to be willing to see things differently. Perspective can give us the sort of mental clarity to forgive someone along with working towards solving things.

Colēgia

Colēgia

Previous

Building up Strength
Next

Collaboration With Others